Monday, November 29, 2010

Pray THE prayer

Are you bold enough to want what God wants or feel what he feels; to seek him with earnest, to pray a prayer and be okay with the outcome. We all have asked ourselves what is my purpose? What is it that God wants for MY life? But are we bold enough to go where we are called to go even if we don't want to go there? I ask myself these questions time and time again. Years ago I started praying "THE prayer" (as my friends know it) in full faith and trust in God to help a sista out. I was having a string of bad relationships.

I had made bad choice after bad choice in men and really wanted to change the pattern. I think this prayer came from a lack of trust in my choices, rather than a full commitment of faith to God. I was desperate. Hey, some of our most profound prayers come out of desperation. Back then when I was "dating" I would pray THE prayer "God, remove this person from my life if they are not supposed to be in it." I prayed this because I knew men were my weakness - like kryptonite. Amazingly, I would pray THE prayer, something would happen and bam,he would just disappear...Really, you think I'm playing. No sign of dissention and I'd pray and bam, poof, whatever...he would just be gone...stop calling...MIA. I would have ignored all the tell-tell signs. Kind of like Pee Wee on the winding road in Pee Wee's Big Adventure, just marching to my own tune to only find myself heart broken in the end; A heartache that could have been avoided.

It has been years since those days and now that I am "putting myself back on the market" (I laugh out loud every time I say that). I have dusted off that old prayer. It is scary in a sense. The scary part is praying THE prayer when everything is seemly ok. Are we willing to walk in God's Will for our lives? Continuously calling on him, not just when it is obvious we are out of alignment. I am reading a book right now, Choosing God's Best - amazing book by the way, and the focus is not just choosing someone who is good, but choosing God's absolute best for our lives. So in my well counseled, mature, grounded life praying THE prayer reminds me to seek God earnestly. Praying THE prayer was great in the beginning as an immature Christian or someone just starting out on their faith frontier, but I have analyzed my thoughts and realized as I have matured in my choices now may be a good time to mature in my prayer life as well.

The new prayer scares me more than the last. "God give me the wisdom to discern who I should allow in my life." Woo just typing that gives me chills. The old prayer, leaving it up to "chance" (well we all know its not chance) and letting God do his miraculous thing puts me more at ease, but growth is about stretching out of your comfort zone and into a NEW faith frontier.

Pray the THE prayer, " God remove this person from my life if they are not supposed to be in it." And/or "God give me the wisdom to discern who I should allow in my life." These prayers are not magic. They should be a reminder to seek first the kingdom...And THAT relationship is what answers life's questions and truly breeds wisdom and discernment...and helps eliminate a whole heck of alot of heartache in the process.

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